Tuesday, November 12, 2013

Holding a chair for Linda

My weekend was pretty great, and also pretty sad. 

Let me tackle the great parts first....

An early birthday celebration with some of my very best friends. Where we ate too much good food, looked at high priced fashion, and then ate some more. WIN. WIN. 

Seeing my family! And ask me how happy I was that Cody reached out to see me? SO HAPPY.  So happy in fact, I made him suffer by taking a selfie with me.  And I'm really not sure why we look like we are either in the club, or trying to develop film.

And of course spending time with my parents. Kids are ALWAYS pumped to go spend time with either set of their grandparents.

But the sad part.

I finally got to see my Aunt Linda.

The kids hung out in the waiting room, reading newspapers, eating candy, and whatever else, while I headed to the ICU with Dad and Jo.

For 22 days I've been in daily contact with my parents about Linda, with phone calls, texts, e-mails, etc., but all along I've just had to envision her. Many times it's felt terrible to be away and not be in the throws of it all with everyone, but there is also some relief in not seeing it.

Saturday I finally saw it.

My Aunt Linda sitting up in bed, eyes wide open, and even a smile that I certainly didn't expect to see. But yet, she was a shell of what she was just a mere 22 days ago.

Sitting there struggling to breathe on her own, sounding as though she might choke to death, and well, I just can't explain what it was like to watch her.

Her eyes glancing down at her fingers that she is slowly losing, and I just kept wondering what was going through her mind.

I just kept thinking, she must feel trapped.

She's come SO FAR, yet, what will her new life be like? Of course we are all praying for restoration, but also for strength for her to face this road.

It honestly broke my heart.

Where she is now: Her heart still keeps going into AFib, she has a blood clot, she still has a tracheotomy, she's going to lose several fingers, possibly some toes too.... and that's all I can think of right now.


But she's also come so far!

She won't sit around the table with us this year at Thanksgiving or Christmas, but I'm praying that next year she will have a special place at the table.

Linda, we are holding a chair just for you....


Tracey said...

Still praying...

Alicia Mcafee said...

Awe! That made me cry Gretchen! Praying for her and you guys too! Glad you had some happy times while at home!

Granny G said...

It is so sad......I have been keeping up with her and still praying also.

Jami said...

Your Aunt Linda sounds like a fighter.

I forget to tell you this but just the other night while I was putting Cooper to bed, he stops me and says out of the blue "how is Pierce and Hope's aunt?" We had prayed when it was all going on and he remembered and wanted to know how she was. Very sweet.

Katherine @ Grass Stains said...

And with all that, she still had a smile for you. What a wonderful woman.

Susie said...

Continue praying for her!!

Hillary said...

I'm so sorry to hear that she's still in the hospital! Prayers for her continued recovery and for your family as you all miss her during these upcoming holidays!