Wednesday, May 15, 2013


Hey bloggy people, there's something urgent I need to share with you.

It's about a new language that I've been learning.

Maybe it's a language you have heard before?

But speaking for myself this is new. And almost daily I've had a crash course lesson in the language I shall call,  KENTUCKYNESE.

You see, almost immediately after I started my job I noticed things being said that I had never heard before.

Not just one thing....

Not just two things....

But so many that eventually I started a list.

And since I'm learning a new language, maybe you should as well. Or maybe you've heard these before? PLEASE LET ME KNOW.

Here is my comprehensive list of KENTUCKYNESE thus far:

1) She's walking like dead lice is falling off of her. (When I heard this one I thought my co-worker may have misspoken. I mean what the heck does THAT mean? Well, apparently it means you are walking slow. WHO KNEW?)

2) Fair to midland. (When you ask someone, "how are you today?" Did you know that some people might reply, "fair to midland" Did you even know this was a response? Uh, not me.)

3) Somethings rotten in Denmark. (I think this one refers to fishy behavior. I think.)

4) It's a comin' a frog-strangler. (It's going to rain a ton)

5) It's gonna rain to beat the band. (Another way to say it's gonna rain a lot)

6) He's meaner than a strip-ed snake. (Evidently he's really mean)

6) Biggest duck in the puddle. (I think this refers to someone thinking they are big stuff.)

7) They can worry warts off a frog. (Apparently this refers to a great worrier.)

8) My stomach thinks my throats been cut. (A disturbing way to say you're hungry.)

9) It's like looking for a pig in a poke. (I'm just not even sure.)

10) You're grinning like an opossum eating briers. (Up to no good?)

11) Using dirty Kotex instead of gasoline. (NO CLUE)

And the last thing I need to explain. Here in these parts when you have a package of crackers, say packaged peanut butter crackers, or even the crackers with cheese in them, they are referred to as NABS.

You guys, it's KENTUCKYNESE.


Hillary said...

Hilarious list! My dad and my grandparents used to say "fair to midland" A LOT. #1 was by far my fav. Just how exactly does tiny little dead things falling out of your hair (ewww...) slow you down?? :)


Liz said...

I hav lived in Kentucky my whole life and never heard of these. We do wear shoes and most of us talk normal. Jhst don't ask Lily is say ice

Jaime Mac said...

UHM, I will just say it - Kentuckynese is weird.
But I HAVE heard 'fair to midland'. but when people say it, with our 'twang' it comes out, "Fair ta midlin'...
This job of your is starting to disturb me...

Jami said...

Never heard any of those before!

Susie said...

Those are to funny!! Never heard those before!!

Arthur Family said...

I've heard "fair to midland" before but none of the rest. Maybe it's a BG thing? Thanks for making me laugh!

Jessica said...

I have lived in KY for 20 years (BG for 14) and I've never heard of any of these...except NABS. I do know about Nabs!

Brittany said...

SEriously, not one of these. ever.

AmandaB said...

I've lived in KY all my life and have not heard any of those! I think you need to rename your post to include the name of your workplace instead of KY ;)

Granny G said...

Haha! I have heard and used most of them growing up in Washington county IN. The only thing missing is ( they stayed until the last dog got off the porch.) LOL